Wait I need stats! Pretty please?
If I ever get around to writing Character Sheet Advanced, here are the basic stats you should keep in mind. Use as few or as many as your heart desires, but above all else, be consistent.
Basic stats
| STRENGTH | How hard can you hit something? |
|---|---|
| DEXTERIY | How flexible are you about avoiding enemy bonks? How steady are your hands when you have to aim with precision accuracy? |
| CONSTITUTION | Assuming you got hurt, how well are you able to continue standing afterwards? |
| INTELLIGENCE | How much knowledge have you amassed (industry specific or otherwise)? |
| WISDOM | How well are you able to execute that knowledge? |
| CHARISMA | How well can you gaslight/gatekeep/girl boss or mansplain/manipulate/male wife your way out of trouble? |
Other stats and why they're not included
Hit points and Armor Class: The thickness of your plot armor is entirely contingent on the DM's discretion. Race and Alignment: build that into your character background. Perception and Initiative: These are dice rolls performed in the moment rather than a fixed stat. Proficiency bonus, Range: Weapons have no numbers attached so this is meaningless. Gauge by vibes. Speed: If you want to do literal speed, or maybe an energy drink, proceed as “buffed”. Experience points and Levels: It’s too subjective and qualitative to outline rules for. You wanna bring Saleforce metrics into your off hours? Be my guest, you fucking weirdo. Limits on saving throws: You’re going to look death in the eye and stick your tongue out a lot. Why penalize yourself over your close calls? A death save is literally just Tuesday, bruh.